Tonights the night!

So, tonight at 8:15 I will be at the hospital getting induced. I was very nervous yesterday for some reason but I have calmed down today. I slept suprisingly well last night and only woke up twice. P and I slept through his alarm that goes off for an hour before it shuts itself off. I think our bodies knew that we needed rest because we are about to be exhausted 24/7. I haven't told many people because I really don't want to be bothered. I don't want a bunch of bored people all up in my shizz. I told my sisters not to come until the morning. I think one is going to stay at my house since it is only about 10 min away from the hospital. The pitocin should take overnight to work anyway but you really never know. Lil K almost couldn't make it due to the fact that her oldest daughter had to go to the ER yesterday and they told her she has the flu. She called me to say she couldn't come for C's birth and hung up on me because she was crying. Somehow Big K talked Lil K into calling my mom and she is going to stay at home with the kids so Lil K can come. Now I'm scared she is going to spread the flu to C and all of us. I mean that could kill my baby since his immune system is still developing. I'm going to pray that God will protect him. It means a lot to me that my sisters are so excited to be there for the birth.

P says he's not nervous or anxious. I believe him. He doesn't get nervous. Hopefully he will help me through the pain of the birth until I can get my epidural. He thinks I'm going to yell at him and be all crazy. He knows I'm not that type of person but I think that is what scares him the most! He also dreads staying in the hospital. I don't know why. I don't think he has spent a single night in a hospital, ever. We will be home before he knows it.

So, pretty soon I will have a brand new baby in my arms! I hope he is healthy!

Tomorrow might be the day.

I don't know how I'm going to sleep tonight. I got my OB appointment moved up by a whole day and am hopeful that she will send me in tomorrow night to be induced. This is just a total guess though. It could be next week for all I know but I am so excited that it could be tomorrow. I'm not miserable or tired of being pregnant like I thought I was going to be; I'm just ready to meet and hold and kiss and see what my baby boy will look like. I want to know that he is born healthy and normal. Everything is squared away except one load of laundry and a dishwasher full of clean dishes. I'm ready when Dr. D says go.

I had a nice conversation with my dad yesterday and my mom today. I have the craziest parents ever. I guess that explains me! My mom was telling me all these stories about when she was pregnant with me, She told me how much I weighed, how long I was, and how big around my head was. She has exact measurements. I can't trust her thought because at a family baby shower one time she argued with me and swore up and down that I was born in Missouri (I was born in Kansas). I think half of the stuff she just makes up, I swear. She told me that she didn't have contractions with me or Lil K. She said she kept feeling like she had to pee and then started "peeing" on herself. She said my dad kept putting towels under her. Turned out her amniotic fluid was leaking out because her water had broken. At least she wasn't high so I kinda believed her. She almost made me feel guilty that I'm not allowing her in the delivery room. Almost.

So, this may be my last entry for a while! Yippee!

Dream, Dream, Nightmare!

Every night I have been having dreams involving my baby. Sometimes it's me having him or trying to have him. One night I had the baby in the hospital I work at (but it wasn't where I really work) and I woke up the next day desperatly trying to find him. You see, the apocolypse was upon us and I had him emergently. I was recovering from labor and they took him to the nursery before I ever got to see him. I couldn't find where the nursery was. I woke up before I found him in the dream.

Last night it was that I had him and my sisters Big K and Lil K took him before I got to see him because they loved him so much. I hadn't seen him in 2 months and I was desperate to breast feed him before all my milk dried up. I was so mad that Big K was trying to tell me how to do everything and wouldn't let me take him home. I tried to breast feed him and he was the cutest and happiest baby I had ever seen. I haven't had these realistic dreams in several months but have been for the past week or so. I think it is because I can't sleep deep due to having to pee every couple hours or so uncomforable in bed that I wake myself up.

I'm so ready to meet C it's ridiculous!

Waiting and waiting some more.

So, I'm 39 weeks along and C has no intentions of coming out anytime soon I'm afraid. At my 37 week doctors appointment I was having a couple of contractions a day. Now, maybe one a day. At my 38 week appointment I was dilated to a one but I'm afraid since I'm not having any more contractions that I'm probobly still a one when I go on Friday. He is getting so big he just kinda rolls on his side in my belly and I can still feel him hiccuping. I can't wait for him to be born. I want to snuggle him, and rock him, and give him kisses and smell that "baby" smell.

I think my nesting has begun. I've been cleaning a lot and trying to finish the never ending laundry. I'm about to start washing C's clothes. I'm only washing hats, socks, blankets, burp clothes, wash clothes, towels and all his 0-3 months clothes and it will probobly be two loads! I can't believe he has so many clothes! P and I installed both carseats today. Those things were kinda hard to figure out. They say 85% of carseats are installed wrong so we read all the instructions and those things aren't budging. It may be because they barely fit in the dang car! They take up a lot of room.

So, everything is ready for C's arrival but until then we will be waiting...

Maternity Leave!

So, I wrote a big long blog the other day about how work was starting to tick me off. For some reason it didn't post. Oh well because I'm on maternity leave now!! It was such a freeing feeling leaving work yesterday. No more work for 13 weeks!! I got lots of hugs and good lucks and "hope the delivery goes smooth". I even got one kiss on the belly from B. I appreciated everything anyone said but I ran like I was being chased out of that place! It is so hard on me to work. One person (a man of course)asked me, "why don't you push it to the end?". Are you kidding? This is the end! I have less than 2 weeks left. How much more can I work? Getting up from those chairs at work hurts so bad and I can't stand all day. The procedures where I have to run back and forth takes all the energy I DON'T have. I feel guilty for sitting and doing nothing sometimes when other people are running around like crazy. I will be glad to do a normal job when I get back. I'm just not looking forward to being in charge and going back to taking call.

I'm going to enjoy every minute of my time off because you don't always get to take 3 months of work without it being a because of something bad happening. I already know it is going to go by way fast.

13 weeks should do the trick!

So, I have a theory. Work gets more stressful before you are about to take time off. I don't know if it because you haven't taken vacation in a long time and it's due or you know that you are about to be off and you have given up mentally. Work for me last week and this week (so far) has been so bad. My boss is really getting on my nerves. She is always giving people days off when we really need them to work. She is constantly short staffing the unit. Today it was me and her until 8:30. What if I went into labor over the weekend? She would have been alone. She overstaffs the evening shift because they are idiots and short staffs the day shift because we are competant. She shits on the capable, smart people by giving us the sicker patients, more patients and constantly gripes at us if we don't get our patients out. Meanwhile, she admits patient for the idiots and draws blood for them set's up pain pumps and calls doctors for them. See what we get for being smart? Nothing. We get an increased work load. Maybe I should act stupid and be slow and act like I don't know what I'm doing. One of the better nurses is getting lazy too. She pulls little tricks just so she doesn't have to do things. She was leaving at change of shift one day. She could have discharged her patient but she was lazy and left it for the next shift. Today she took over 30 minutes to transfer a patient meanwhile I admitted 2 patients for her while she drug her feet and didn't even say thank you or attempt to help me with anything when she came back. I asked her to give IV pain meds and verify and order with a doctor. She didn't do any of them. LAZY. Needless to say I really need a vacation. 13 weeks should do the trick!

New Mothers Resolutions

Lots of people on Facebook are talking about resolutions for the new year. I have never been the type of person to make resolutions. I know I will never keep them anyway and what's wrong with liking the way I am and not wanting to change anything? With this in mind I have decided to make some New mother resolutions. My parenting goals of sorts.

1. He will not know what McDonalds is. Kids don't like the food anyway. It's all about the Happy Meal toy and the playground.
2. I will feed him only organic meats and milk. I'm not going to say this is all he will ever eat but I will try. There is just too much crap in milk and meats these days. Organic fruits and veggies aren't that important but I will feed him these as much as I can also.
3. He will not drink soda.
4. He will not eat candy until he is older. I know I can't keep it from him forever but I am going to try. I don't want him to be one of those kids screaming for candy at the check out stand or getting cavities filled when they are 2.
5. He will know who God is and we will pray together. I will take him to church when I go.
6. If he is bad and we are supposed to do something fun that day, he WILL NOT go. There will be no rewards for him being bad. No matter what it is.
7. He will go to the dentist regularly. You only have one set of teeth and I don't want him to be scared of the dentist.
8. He will know how important it is to get an education. I will use my family as an example.
9. I will not buy him a car and he will pay his own insurance.
10. He will get a job when he is 16.
11. He will know how to put on a condom and our family will be open about sex. I will use my family as an example of what can happen when you have unprotected sex.
12. He will be doing chores all his life. None of this cleaning up after him while he plays.
13. Video game and TV time will be limited. He will play outside most of the time.
14. Each Christmas he will go through his room and pick several toys to donate to charity. There is no sense having so many toys.

Most of these I have come up with by watching other parents and learning from their mistakes.

Just for fun pregnancy survey.

Name? Tiffany
Age? 30 (yikes!)
Height? 5'4"
Pre-pregnancy weight? 224
About The Father: you should be jealous he is not your baby's daddy!
Name? P
Age? 29
Height? 5"11"
Are you still together? DUH!
About Your Pregnancy:
Is this your first pregnancy? yep.
When did you find out you were pregnant? memorial day weekend.
Was it planned? no, but we were letting God decide when the time was right for us.
What was your first reaction? I didn't believe it. I had to take another one the next morning to be sure. I still didn't really believe it until I got an official test at the doctors office.
Who was with you when you found out? P. I was alone at the doctors office.
Who was the first person you told? My big sister K
How did your parents react? VERY excited.
How far along are you? 36 weeks!
What was your first symptom? NAUSEA! That is what made me take a test.
What is your due date? 1/29/11
Do you know the sex of the baby? Yes
If so, what is it? a boy!!
Have you picked out names? yes. we had them picked before we got married.
If so, what are they? Cash Jacob (Zoe Elizabeth if it were a girl)
How much weight have you gained? 33 pounds so far.
Do you have stretch marks? actually I do! I didn't think I could get anymore!
Have you felt the baby move? yes, and it is amazing every time!
Have you heard the heartbeat? lots of times.
About the birth:Home or hospital birth? hospital
Natural or medicated birth? MEDICATED!
Who will be in the delivery room with you? P, my big and little sister.
Will you breastfeed? I'm going to do my darndest.
Do you think you'll need a c-section? Nah. I really hope I don't.
Will you cry when you hold the baby for the first time? Probobly. I am a crier.
What's the first thing you might say to him/her? I will probobly say hi!
Would you let someone videotape the birth? No, I don't want to see that later.
Are you excited about the birth, or scared? Very excited and nervous about the pain.